forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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