Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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