if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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