I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
