Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
