I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm sobbing to NWA
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
