I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
