would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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