We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize