eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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