I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
