I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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