: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
