We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize