I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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