It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
