I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
