I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
