k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize