I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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