hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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