What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
