Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
