I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
