BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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