bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
