I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
