Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
