That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
