Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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