I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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