You're a womanizer and a bitch.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
