Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
