This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
