i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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