I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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