He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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