I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
