There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
