You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
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