oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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