did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
