I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
she peed on how many people?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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