Fine. I'll sleep in my office
handjob tips. give me some.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
