everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
