New invention idea: vibrating tampons
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
