i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
