he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
