i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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