ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
